No New Year Reservations

Ring in the New Year...for it has arrived in a hurry.  The last was an abundant one to be sure. - full of gains and losses; beginnings and endings, laughter and tears...

Had I the gift of Flash-Forward this time last year, I'd never have fashioned the life I have now.  How could I?  Life gives no advance notice - it just happens as it should.  Unexpected, unplanned and inevitable as all can be.  

In 12 month's time, important contracts have successfully closed and some hard-fought battles have been lost.  I've bid adieu to so-called love.  At one point surrendering to the whole notion - figuring perhaps it was time to throw in the towel for lack of a better idea.   But as they say...it all comes out in the wash.  After resolving to truly Let Go...to let life find me instead of seeking it out...somehow it all ironed itself out.  And then in that Acceptance, I said Hello.

In that window of time...I was able to finally see what I had been unknowingly blocking out.  I knew what I wanted my life to look like and how I wanted to feel...but was subconsciously choosing avenues that were destined to fail.  That self-fulfilling prophecy only revealed itself later on...when faced with something that had the potential to be Real.  I nearly folded and would have lost a lot had I caved to my subconscious fears.  Once I became aware, I stayed...and now here I am.  

And here I want to stay.  No Reservations.  For once.

Since this journey of self-reflection began about 18 months ago, I have changed so much from the inside out.  I've made strong decisions based on my inner voice - which I may have silenced in days before.  I still have more renovations in store (and need the occasional reminder of lessons already learned) - but by in large, I have come an awful long way.  And of that, I am happy and proud.

So I step eagerly into this next calendar, determined to keep on this path.  Not knowing what direction I'll take, but remaining open to the possibilities.  Each and every one...

Sweet Dreams, 

Me

"To conquer oneself is the best and noblest victory; to be vanquished by one's own nature is the worst and most ignoble defeat." - Plato